clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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