I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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