There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
