the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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