Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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