Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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