STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
