guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
