left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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