and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
