Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
