let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
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