Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Randomize
