Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
