"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
What a dumb baby whore.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
