dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
