is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
