Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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