bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Randomize
