I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
did i just pee glitter
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Randomize
