It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
