Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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