I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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