just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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