Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
