And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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