could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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