Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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