I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
