You really coming over, don't trick.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
