# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I licked your asshole in confidence.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
