why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
