I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
