Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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