you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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