You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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