Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
