FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
