Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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