Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Randomize
