C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
