lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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