Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
