just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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