Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
