If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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