I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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