Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize