apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
