No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
